An appointment with the psychotherapist today highlighted how I’m jogging along with my daily life quite nicely but failing to acknowledge my successes. I feel like a bit of a muppet for doing this, but what the hell, maybe if it’s out there so to speak, the process of acknowledgement will become easier in time.
1. This week I have been to the cinema. It has been the first time that I have been able to watch a film at the cinema comfortably since the accident, so 17 months.
2. Last weekend I went to the Gadget Show and had a fab time, despite having to be wheeled around in a wheelchair (though it does have its perks e.g queue skipping!)
3. We stayed in a hotel last weekend for a night, had a lovely time in general sipping free drinks and munching our way (well, I say our, that’s a wee bit of a generalisation really. Not so much our way, more my way really through mountains of mini pastries, cakes and finger sandwiches…bye bye Weightwatchers!) in the executive lounge, having paid £15 for both of us for the upgrade.
4. Said hotel stay did not trigger a flare up
5. The psychotherapist said something today which hit a chord and that was that I’m now getting on with my life despite my disability. The more I think about this, the more I feel this applies most strongly to my situation. This time last year I was mainly housebound and unable to do the things that I loved such as visiting the gym, walking, going out, meeting friends and going to the cinema. I can now do those things, there are certainly restrictions and limitations and although my disability impedes my activities, I’m learning to find ways around them.
This is something upon which I have been reflecting for the past few days. My life is not going to return to normal i.e how it was pre accident and no matter how much I yearn for that to happen, it won’t. I’ve spent such a lot of time, hoping and working towards getting “my old life” back and it struck me the other day that’s not going to happen. So, in a New Year resolution-esque manner, albeit it 4 months late, from now on I’m not getting my old life back, I’m rebuilding my life, block by block.